Layered, Rude and Funny Chinese Proverbs

Layered, Rude and Funny Chinese Proverbs

A bird does not sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has a song.

• Layered Chinese Proverbs
• Best Chinese Proverbs - With Their Meaning
• Top Ten Quotations from Confucius
• Rude and Funny Chinese Proverbs
• Funny Chinese Jokes

• Chinese New Year in 2011 starts on February 3rd

Background of Chinese Proverbs

Will and Guy have continued their research into Chinese proverbs. It is a worthwhile task and we have learned that the Chinese people use proverbs, old and new to carry out specific functions within the culture. This, in itself, is not unusual and many ancient cultures from the Egyptians, Greeks and Romans up to the present day utilise myths, proverbs and legends to educate.

For example:

• The ancient Chinese used proverbs to teach their children good manners and to help them learn the proper way of doing things.
• Proverbs were also used to encourage people to think about things in the right way, which was very Taoist.
• Proverbs were also used to help each person become the best person they could be.

Layered Chinese Proverbs

Chinese proverbs are "layered". The superficial message becomes apparent immediately. But as one re-reads, one discovers deeper meaning.  Our examples may help to explain why Chinese philosophers are seen as a source of great wisdom.

• A book is like a garden carried in the pocket.
• An ant may well destroy a whole dam.
• Be not afraid of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still.
• Behind an able man there are always other able men.
• Better a diamond with a flaw than a pebble without one.
• Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
• A book holds a house of gold.
• A clear conscience never fears midnight knocking.
• A closed mind is like a closed book; just a block of wood.
• Do not want others to know what you have done? Better not have done it anyways.
• A bird does not sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has a song.
• A dog won't forsake his master because of his poverty; a son never deserts his mother for her homely appearance.

Ten Further Examples of the Best Chinese Proverbs - With Their Meaning Included:

1. Perspective - The participant's perspectives are clouded while the bystander's views are clear.
2. Patience - Pick the flower when it is ready to be picked.
3. Courage - If you don't go into the cave of the tiger, how are you going to get its cub?
4. Tradition - Follow the local custom when you go to a foreign place.
5. Nature - It is impossible to change your basic characteristics.
6. Wisdom - Once bitten by a snake, you are even frightened by a rope that resembles a snake.
7. Perspective - Your neighbour's wife looks prettier than your own.
8. Life - When you go up to the mountain too often, you will eventually encounter the tiger.
9. Nature - Elephant tusks cannot grow out of a dog's mouth.
10. Nature - When the tiger comes down from the mountain to the plains, it is bullied by the dogs.

Will and Guy's Top Ten Quotations from Confucius [551-479 BC]

We like these sayings, not only because they were meaningful in ancient times, but because they still have significance for us all today.  Here are our best ancient Chinese proverbs:

1. Study without reflection is a waste of time.
   Reflection without study is dangerous.
2. A man who has committed a mistake, and doesn't correct it, is committing another mistake.
3. When anger arises, think of the consequences.
4. Words are the voice of the heart.
5. Silence is a true friend who never betrays.
6. Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
7. When prosperity comes, do not use all of it.
8. He that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.
9. To know what is right and not to do it is the worst cowardice.
10. Everything has beauty but not everyone sees it.

Rude and Funny Chinese Proverbs

Many of the earlier proverbs to be found on this page are serious and have deeper meanings.  In this short section we supply a number of silly, occasionally rude, funny, amusing and downright stupid "Chinese" sayings which you might laugh at.

Our true reason for publishing these crude proverbs is to stimulate discussion; Will and Guy seek to get an insight into the best of Chinese humour.  English humour has its fair share of rude and crude humour, yet as this site demonstrates, English also has the capacity for humour based on puns featuring words with similar sounds but different meanings.  An another rich source of English humour comes from our willingness to laugh at ourselves through understatement, satire or irony.

Does Chinese humour centre around bodily functions?  Or are there also deeper more subtle elements that have got lost in the translations that we see in "Chinese Proverbs"?

We hope that even though our Auntie disapproves, that you our readers are not offended by these Chinese sayings:

• Man who run behind car get exhausted.
• Man who run in front of car get tired.
• Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
• Man with one chopstick go hungry.
• Man who scratch bottom should not bite fingernails.
• Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
• War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
• Wife who put husband in doghouse, soon find him in cat house.
• Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
• Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
• Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
• Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
• Man who pass wind in church sit in own pew.
• Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
• Man that cooks carrots and pees in same pot, very unsanitary.

Footnote
Please send us funny Chinese proverbs.  We are also interested in other aspects of Chinese humour.

See More About the Chinese New Year Calendar, also Jokes and Funny Stories:

• Chinese New Year 2010   • Chinese New Year Stories   • Chinese New Year jokes   • What New Year

• Chinese New Year 2011   • Chinese New Year 2012   • Chinese traditional foods   • Funny Chinese food

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