My Dad is Better than Your Dad

Will and Guy's Humour - Dads

Here we have one of the earliest examples of playground banter.' My Dad is better than your Dad', is a particularly male boast, I wonder if there is a female equivalent?

• My Dad is Better than Your Dad - Cricket
• My Dad is Better than Your Dad - Baseball
• Ultimate My Dad is Better than Your Dad

My Dad is Better than Your Dad - Cricket

Three boys, Peter, Michael and Algernon were returning home from school one day.  They were sitting in the back of a people carrier belonging to Michael's mother, when Peter started the time honoured game of paternal one upmanship.

Peter said, 'My dad's way faster than any of yours, he can bowl a 90 mph cricket ball from the bowler's end and run and hit it before it reaches the wicket at the other end.'

Michael said, 'Oh yeah? Well, my dad can shoot an arrow from his bow and run to the target and hold it up to make sure the arrow hits the bulls eye' .

The last boy, Algernon, said, 'Your dads don't even come close to being faster than mine. My dad is a schoolteacher and even though he works every day until 4:00 he gets home at 3:30' .

American Translation of My Dad is Better than Your Dad.

One day, three boys, Bart, Buddy and Chuck were on the school bus, when Bart started the time honoured game of paternal one upmanship.

Bart said, 'My dad's way faster than any of yours, he can throw a 120 mph fast ball, run from the mound, pick up his bat, and strike a home run.'

Buddy, the second boy said, 'Oh yeah? Well, my dad can fire a shell from his Magnum  run to the target and hold it up to make sure the shell hits the bulls eye' .

The last boy, Chuck, said, 'Your dads don't even come close to being faster than mine. My dad is a 10th grade teacher and even though he works every day until 4:00 he still gets home at 3:30' .

Ultimate My Dad is Better than Your Dad

This was a part of the sermon at the John Pounds Unitarian Church, Old Portsmouth: retold by Bill Ryan.

Three boys were talking together about what their father's did for a living.

Boy 1 began by saying that his Dad wrote a few words on a piece of paper, sent them away and received £20 for them and they called it a poem.

Boy 2, not to be outdone said that his Dad wrote a few pages of words, sent them away and received £100 and they called it a story.

Boy 3  was full of himself and said that his Dad wrote a couple of sides of words, read them out on Sunday morning, called it a sermon and it took 6 people to go round and collect all the money.

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