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Funny Quotes from Employee Evaluations
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Funny Quotes from Employee Performance Evaluations

Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.
Unknown

  1. Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.
  2. His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.
  3. I would not allow this employee to breed.
  4. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered in a trap.joke foot in mouth
  5.  When he opens his mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.
  6.  He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.
  7.  This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
  8. She sets low personal standards, then consistently fails to achieve them.
  9.  This employee should go far --- and the sooner he starts, the better.
  10. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
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Ten More Funny Quotes From Employee Evaluations

  1.  Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.  Then he fell out of the family tree.
  2.  A room temperature I.Q.  If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
  3. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
  4.  Got a full six-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.
  5.  A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.
  6.  A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.
  7.  A prime candidate for natural de-selection.  It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.
  8.  Bright as Alaska in December.
  9.  If brains were taxed, he'd get a rebate.  
  10. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; but he only gargles. 
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