Funny Quotes from Employee Evaluations

Funny Quotes from Employee Performance Evaluations:

1. Since my last report, he has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.

2. His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of morbid curiosity.

3. I would not allow this employee to breed.

4. Works well when under constant supervision and cornered in a trap.

5. When he opens his mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.

6. He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle.

7. This young lady has delusions of adequacy.

8. She sets low personal standards, then consistently fails to achieve them.

9. This employee should go far --- and the sooner he starts, the better.

10. This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

More funny quotes from employee evaluations

11. Not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

12. Got into the gene pool while the lifeguard wasn't watching.

13. A room temperature I.Q.

14. Got a full six-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.

15. A gross ignoramus -- 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.

16. A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.

17. A prime candidate for natural de-selection.

18. Bright as Alaska in December.

19. Fell out of the family tree.

20. If brains were taxed, he' d get a rebate.

21. If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

22. It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.

23. Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; but he only gargles.

Footnote:
Please send us your funny quotes from employee evaluations.

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