Funny Warning Signs

Here are Will and Guy's Collection of Funny Warning Signs

Funny pictures and signs give us a laugh, but we wonder how much they cost their owners in lost business, or for paying for replacement calligraphy?

• Caution: This Machine Has No Brain
• Try Dialling 999 on This Phone (or 911 in USA)
• Do Not Light With a Match!
• Fire Exit
• Notice the Notice?
• Do Not Park Here - Or Else
• Waiting Will be Prosecuted

Caution - No Brainer?

Often it's the ludicrousness of these notices that makes them so funny.

Try Dialling 999 on This Phone (or 911 in USA)

Help Push Red Button -
Or Yell!

Signspotting: Explosion!

'Explorion' Photographed in Gosport, Hampshire, England

More Funny Warning Signs

Some signs are just plain stupid, while others are merely full of their own importance.  These next two warning signs have an animal theme.

Warning! Alligators Can be Dangerous!

.... as if you needed telling!

Funny Warning Signs

On a plumber's truck:
'We repair what your husband fixed.'

On another plumber's truck:
'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.'

On Devendra Singh's plumber's truck
You have tried the cowboys - now try the Indians.

In a restaurant window:
'Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up.'

See more funny warning signs.

Do Not Light with a Match!

Electric light.  Do not attempt to light with match.  Simply press the switch on the wall by the door.   However, don't take the fire exit, see below:

Problem with Fire Exit

Not so much a funny warning sign, more a fishy exit strategy.

See more funny warning signs.

Funny Warning Sign - Unnecessary Notice

Don't Park Here - Or Else

• The Wrath of the ancients will fall upon your head
• Rabid squirrels will invade your home
• Your vehicle will start making that expensive knocking sound again
• Caution advised!
• See more funny signs.

Waiting will be prosecuted

I suppose we can forgive this stupid notice on the ground that it's an Engrish problem

Funny Warning Sign Story

On a warm and mild New Year's Eve, Martha's Vineyard revelers were generally well-behaved. Police across the Island reported the night was quiet and three arrests made Friday night were for operating under the influence (OUI).

Steamship Authority (SSA) employees did fish a man out of the water on New Year's Eve; it happened this way:

Wayne Lamson, SSA general manager, said the Martha's Vineyard arrived at the Vineyard Haven terminal at 8:15 pm and docked in the north slip. As a result, passengers debarked on the south side of the vessel. 

Michael Grekwizc of Warwick, R.I. decided to exit the ferry wearing rollerblades. "He came down the ramp and then did a 360 [degree] turn and lost his balance and went over the netting that was across the opening on the elevated platform," Mr. Lamson said. "So he ended up in slip one."

Mr. Lamson said the crew reacted quickly and threw two life rings and a life vest to Mr. Grekwizc. Another employee lowered the transfer bridge as low as possible, allowing the man to climb up on it and out of the frigid water. The resulting commotion led to a delay in loading the boat for her departure. Mr. Lamson said there was about a 20-minute delay in departure.

Mr. Lamson said he was thankful no employees and the man were not injured. He said any accident involving the water is a serious matter particularly in the winter.

Asked if he contemplated any changes in policy, Mr. Lamson said there are not enough signs and rules to enforce common sense.

Footnote:
Fred Roven kindly sent the above story, please send us your funny warning signs.

See more pictures of funny road signs, featuring cars and street notices

• Funny traffic signs   • Funny road signs   • Funny road signs UK   • Funny animal road signs

• Pictures of stupid signs   • Funny car pictures   • Dyslexic signs   • Funny garbage   • Funny signs

• Pointless signs   • Funny street signs   • Funny no parking signs   • Parking yellow lines   • 'No' signs

Joke of the Day Email Get a clean joke delivered to your inbox every day, no strings attached, just part of our service.  Free subscription to our Funny Joke of the Day email. We have over 1,500 pages of funny pictures, clean jokes, stories and amusing videos.  Please use the Search below to find a topic of particular interest:	Thought of the Day Subscription Our offer is to email you an inspirational 'Thought of the day'. Your subscription is completely free of cost and there are no adverts.  Sign up for our 'Thought of the Day'. ›
Custom Search Please email Guy with your joke or funny picture: • Latest jokes