Jokes that Make Will and Guy Laugh in October

Jokes for October that made Will and Guy Laugh

It's a funny kind of month, October. For the really keen cricket (or baseball) fan it's when you discover that your wife left you in May. - Denis Norden

Selected Jokes for October

Special Occasions in October

Selection of Will and Guy's Selection for October

Mexican Cyclist

A man on a bike, carrying two saddlebags, was stopped by a guard while crossing the US-Mexican border. He had rigged up a primitive rope bridge to by-pass the customs control.

'What's in the bags? demanded the guard.
'Sand,' the cyclist answered.
'Take them off. I need to take a look.' retorted the guard.

The guard emptied the bags and found out they contained nothing but sand. The man reloaded his bags and continued across the border. A week later, the same man was crossing again with two more bags. The guard demanded to see them, and again they contained nothing but sand. This continued every week for six months, until one day the cyclist failed to appear. A few days later, that same guard ran into the cyclist in Tijuana.

'Hey, where have you been?' the guard enquired. 'You sure had us wondering. We knew you were smuggling something across the border. So tell me and I won't say a word. What was it?'

The man smiled broadly and told him the truth, 'Bicycles!'

Letter of the Month - Dear Abby

Dear Abby,

I have never written to you before, but I really need your advice. I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs. phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up.

My wife has been going out with 'the girls' a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, 'just some friends from work, you don’t know them.' I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn’t want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her.

Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with 'the girls'. It was at that moment, crouching behind my clubs, that I noticed that the graphite shaft on my driver appeared to have a hairline crack right by the club head.

Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it back to the golf shop where I bought it?

Thanks Jim

Clogged arteries? - Eat avocados

Mono unsaturated fat in avocados lowers cholesterol.

Englishman, Frenchman and Irishman

An Englishman, a Frenchman and an Irishman were in a pub talking about their children.

'My son was born on St George's Day, 'remarked the Englishman, 'So we obviously decided to call him George.'

'That's a real coincidence', observed the Frenchman', My daughter was born on Valentine's Day, so we decided to call her Valentine.'

'That's really incredible', drawled the Irishman, 'Exactly the same thing happened with my son Pancake.'

The Selkirk Settler

®

See more good jokes and funny stories for each month:

● Jokes Months ● January ● February ● March ● April ● May ● June

● July ● August ● September ● October ● November ● December ● Home

Joke of the day

Get a clean joke delivered to your inbox every day, no strings attached, just part of our free service. Subscribe to Will and Guy's Joke of the Day.

We have over 1,000 pages of funny pictures, clean jokes, funny stories and amusing videos. Please use the Search box below to find a topic of particular interest:

Jokes for mobile phones / cell phones

Will and Guy now have clean jokes and funny pictures formatted for 'mobi' or cell phones. Discover more about our 'mobi' sub-site

If you enter the following uri into your mobile or cell phone, then you can view Will and Guy's site on your handset: http://guy-sports.com/mobi/

Email Guy and send your joke or funny picture to:

● Home ● Latest Pages