Have you ever received a letter where the signature at the bottom of the page accurately reflects the profession
of the person writing? Or perhaps in a newspaper you have come across an appropriate name which matches the type of job the person has. For example an editor of the Christian Science Monitor had the name of
Silence Bellows.
Guy and Will have researched some more which may make you smile. Where possible we have shown where the names come from. Sadly we cannot guarantee their accuracy:
Bankers, Wallowa County, Oregon: Cheatham & Steele
Chorister, Westminster Choir College, Princeton, New Jersey: Justin Tune
Gynaecologist, New
York Hospital, New York City: Dr Zoltan Ovary
Chairman, Tetley Tea Company, London: Tetley Ironsides Tetley Jones
Dentist, Roslyn Heights, New York: Dr. E. Z. Filler
Phlebotomist, St Mary's
Hospital, Portsmouth, UK:
Lavinia Blood
The national Director of Surgery at the U.S. Department of Veterans
Affairs in Washington, D.C. Dr Blades
Plumber Worcester UK: Mr Turner-Heaton
Lloyds/TSB
Bank Manager, Waterlooville, UK: Mr F. Knox
Mr. Vice, Malefactor, New Orleans, Louisiana. Arrested 890 times and convicted 421, probably a record
(International Herald Tribune)
®
More Funny Name and Job
Interior decorator, Reading, UK: Derek Paynter
Municipal Tax Collector, Brazil
(Financial Times): Cardiac Arrest da Silva
Funeral Director, Sydney, Australia: C. D'
Eath and Sons [Will once knew a Mrs Pine-Coffin from Devon,
UK but she was an owner of holiday cottages not an undertaker]
Landscape Gardeners from Salisbury, UK called: Budd and Bush
Silent Movie Organist, Rochester, New York: C. Sharp Minor
Central
City, Kentucky automobile salesman: Henry Ford Carr
Never Fail is a builder in Tulsa, Oklahoma
Mr Robbins is a renowned ornithologist (bird
scientist and bird-bander) at a Federal wildlife research center in
Maryland, USA. He is co-author of the guidebook "Birds of North
America".
This one does fit in at all with the others but we couldn't
resist it: Charles Adolphe Faux-Pas Bidet, Commissaire de Police, Paris, France in the 1930's
Footnote: If you know other funny name / job
combinations like these please send them into us.
An aptronym or aptonym is a name aptly suited to its owner. They can
often be hilarious, amusing and funny. Will and Guy have researched these
examples for you to enjoy.
David Bird is an ornithologist.
Scott Constable is, of course, a
policemen.
Helen Painter is an artist.
Raymond Strike has to be a Trades
Union leader.
Shona Shears cuts people's hair.
Steve Adore is a dock
worker.
Dr Joseph Babey is a paediatrician.
Dr Djerk works as a
psychiatrist.
Bertha de Bleus is a jazz singer [sounds suspicious to me
says Will].
And yes, Dr D'Eath is a surgeon.
Ones for luck: Roy Grout is
a bricklayer who has a mate named Morris Glaser who does the windows.
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