Football - Offside for the Ladies
Will and Guy's Football - Offside for the Ladies
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The offside rule explained for the ladies
Picture this: you're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till.
Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have. The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire. Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes. The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma.
She prepares to throw her purse to you. If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes.
At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, *whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes. Always remembering that until the purse had *actually been thrown* it would be plain wrong to push in front of the other shopper.
Goran Granic - Looses his bite
A Croatian football star says his team are losing matches because he can no longer commit fouls since finding God.
Hajduk Split defender Goran Granic has come in for a storm of criticism for abandoning his trademark hard tackles on opponents.
But Granic has now revealed his Catholicism is behind his softer style of play.
He told daily newspaper Slobodna Dalmacija, 'I'm so devoted to God now that I have started to avoid committing fouls during matches. God has created football for fun and relaxation. He would not like players to commit harsh fouls.'
He added, 'I could probably have saved some key goals during the season, including in the Champions League qualifying games, if I had committed fouls to stop players scoring.'
Hajduk Split are reigning Croatian champions but this season they failed to qualify for the Champions League and are currently fifth in the Croatian league.
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